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DBT Skills · Mindfulness

Loving-Kindness

When you need to soften toward yourself or someone else. It’s one of the DBT mindfulness skills, and the skills picker can route a client here in the moment.

Not sure this is the right skill?

The free DBT skills picker asks what’s happening right now and routes to a skill to try.

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When to reach for Loving-Kindness

When you need to soften toward yourself or someone else.

How to practice Loving-Kindness

  1. Pick a person — maybe yourself, maybe someone you're hard with.
  2. Bring their face to mind. Say silently: "May you be safe. May you be well."
  3. Add: "May you be at ease. May you be free from suffering."
  4. Stay with it 60 seconds. If it feels fake, that's fine. The practice is repetition.
If it doesn’t help: the DBT skills picker routes next to Non-Judgmentally. Different skills land for different people and moments — trying the next-best fit is part of the method, not a failure.

Tracking Loving-Kindness on a diary card

Whether a client used Loving-Kindness — and whether it helped — is exactly what a DBT diary card captures. Recording skill use day by day is how you see, in session, whether mindfulness skills are generalizing.

Track skill use for free

Build a custom diary card that tracks the skills you’re working on, or track it digitally in Theracharts.

Build a diary cardAll DBT skills

FAQ

What is Loving-Kindness in DBT?

Loving-Kindness is a DBT mindfulness skill. When you need to soften toward yourself or someone else.

When should I use Loving-Kindness?

Reach for loving-kindness when you need to soften toward yourself or someone else.

In crisis? Call or text 988 (Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, US) — free, confidential, 24/7. This page is educational and is not therapy, diagnosis, or a substitute for professional care.